Monday, December 3, 2007

The Kite Runner

Trailer (Opens 12/14 limited, 12/28 wide)
At first I thought this was one of those "be grateful for what you have" stories. It's wide release is scheduled AFTER Christmas, so you'd think when kids started complaining about getting Guitar Hero instead of Rock Band, parents could take them to see this movie and say, "see, you got a fun video game, and all they get to play with is a stupid kite." Then those kids would remember the thing that's collecting dust in the attic, that was once bought at a garage sale and will similarly be sold at a garage sale, and kiss their precious copy of Guitar Hero.

But as it turns out, the kites in this movie are a GOOD thing. Even crazier, most of the kids don't fly the kites, they watch until a kite has been cut from its string, then "run" and chase it down. Basically, they're like ball-boys in tennis, except they don't get paid. Ummmm....awesome? We should teach these kids 52-card pick-up if they REALLY want to be entertained. Regardless, you should start buying your stock in the Mary Poppins right now, because kites are making a comeback. (P.S. I AM aware that you buy stock in companies, and that you can't invest in movie characters, okay?)

Anyway, as we've already seen, orphan movies are in this holiday season. But unlike the American version, where the boy gets to find both of his parents, the Afghan boy can merely hope for a proxy at best. This happens to be a man who knew the boy's father very well, as we are reassured in the trailer ("two friends, as close as brothers"):
Well, they appear to be friends, but not THAT close. Can we do better?

Hmm, that's a little better, I suppose, but the one kid might just be really interested in the book...

THAT'S IT! When you've got each other in a mutual choke-hold around the neck, you know you've hit the friendship jackpot.

So yeah, the whole point is the "redemption" of the main character, which is required because of betraying this close, close, so very very close friend. As already mentioned, this redemption takes the form of rescuing the child. Along the way he will need to fight the Taliban, who, along with harboring terrorists, have also placed an unjust and horrible universal ban on kites. How will our guy do it? With the help of modern day's extreme disguising technology...a fake beard.
Godspeed, Mr. Protagonist.

I have a ninja turtle kite....

It is awesome...
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